m'punyai seorg teman yg bek,teman susah senang b'sama,amat2 ak hrgai..he's nice..truly nice..even bru bpe bln kwn dgn die tp ak senang dgn die sbb ak blh cite every single thing dgn die..even ak x ckp pape pn,die dh blh bce emosi ak once die pndg ak..so mmg xleh nk tipu even ak senyum2 n trying my best nk hide sume tu..
n at d end,die akn slow talk dgn ak until ak bka mulut..die kwn ak yg sgt2 bgs..mmg x penah amek kesempatan n sgt2 understanding..
die hormat pendrian ak bl ak tolak tok nek moto dgn die..siap teman ak jln kaki lg tok blk umah dr khulafa..dlu die escort ak dgn moto die then die escort by walking together wif me even after ak smpai umah,die kna pusing smula ke khulafa amek mto sorg2..
kadang2 tu b'tekak gak ngn die sbb serba slh lak bl die willing jln kaki teman ak..pdhal tu bnda yg dh lama die tglkn..at 1st knl die lg,die mmg sgt2 protective..dlu curi2 escort ak sbb die xnk jd pape kt ak bl ak jln kaki sorg2..pas kntoi dgn ak,die escort la scra terang2an..then bnda yg paling ak x b'kenan tu bl stpkli lepak khulafa,most of d time,die yg kuakn duit byr mknan ak..tu yg plng ak x ske..bl ak bg duit ak,mati2 xnk time..bkn perangai ak la tok bia kn lelaki abiskn duit tok ak even dlm hal kecik2..xnk t'utang budi..
ak ske kwn ngn die sbb die x segan knlkn ak kt kwn2 die n ktorg leh lepak sme2..ak ngn die pn kasar..sume prangai x senonoh ak kua..automatically sume prangai buruk ak d pertontonkn kt die..dr cra gelak yg t'bahak2,ske mengomel,ske lwn ckp,nek tgn.sume la..lum lg perangai buas time tgk bola..die sorg je yg tau prangai sbnr ak..even die lelaki,kasar tu lbh kt ak..he's realy a nice fren of mine..
bl b'kwn tnpa melibatkn ati n perasaan ni,mmg best giler..ak blh jd ak yg sbnr..lgpn ak mmg dh ckp awl2 yg ak xnk cinta2 dh..so kt pihak ak,mmg tu la yg ak rse..juz kwn tp kt pihak die,ak xtau sbb most of d time,ktorg lepak mamak almost everyday..org ckp,llki n pompuan ni xleh b'kwn bek sbb mst ad seblh pihak yg akn simpan perasan yg bkn sekadar kwn..hope x la sbb die pn tau ati ak ni kt spe..sbb tu ak xleh time org len..
Monday, September 24, 2012
Friday, September 21, 2012
reality cuma mimpi
bl die on9,ak offline..bl die dh offline,ak online blk..
ni la rutin ari2 4 d past 3 days..
bkn sengaja nk elak tp t'pkse avoid die cmni..
sbb ati ak ni x kuat lg nk avoid die sepenuhny..
ak xnk once die chat ak,p'dirian ak tok avoid die trus goyah..
tu yg ak paling lemah sbb ak tend to reply him once he text me..
so how comes ak nk avoid die if dis thing hapens???
but deep down inside,hepi gak tgk die on9 sbb tau die x kua date ngn mne2 pompuan on dat time..
but tetbe confius sbb dlu time kua dgn die,die online je =_='
haiyoo..ntah2 die tgh date smbil on9 kot???? T_T'
dah2..jgn fkr pape..juz think positive aini..
everything's gonna b ok..
ko kna hepi if die dh ad some1 else yg blh bhgiakn die..
jodoh kn..maybe jodoh die dgn org len..bkn ko..
redha..redha..
chillax girl..x mao sedih2..
(ok..pretending to b ok @_@)
yezzaaaaa..syg lg kt die rupa2nye..xleh nk tipu dri sndr..hehehehe
ni la rutin ari2 4 d past 3 days..
bkn sengaja nk elak tp t'pkse avoid die cmni..
sbb ati ak ni x kuat lg nk avoid die sepenuhny..
ak xnk once die chat ak,p'dirian ak tok avoid die trus goyah..
tu yg ak paling lemah sbb ak tend to reply him once he text me..
so how comes ak nk avoid die if dis thing hapens???
but deep down inside,hepi gak tgk die on9 sbb tau die x kua date ngn mne2 pompuan on dat time..
but tetbe confius sbb dlu time kua dgn die,die online je =_='
haiyoo..ntah2 die tgh date smbil on9 kot???? T_T'
dah2..jgn fkr pape..juz think positive aini..
everything's gonna b ok..
ko kna hepi if die dh ad some1 else yg blh bhgiakn die..
jodoh kn..maybe jodoh die dgn org len..bkn ko..
redha..redha..
chillax girl..x mao sedih2..
(ok..pretending to b ok @_@)
yezzaaaaa..syg lg kt die rupa2nye..xleh nk tipu dri sndr..hehehehe
Thursday, September 20, 2012
suami
misi mencari suami sedang d jalankn..wohohohoo..gatai noe bunyinye to d truth is dat, x gatal pn..cme m'cri keredhaan Ilahi je..bhgia dunia akhirat..sometimes rse mcm dh ready nk jd wife org n ad keluarga sndr but kadang2,rse lum ready lg..
mne x nye..bl fkr2 blk,prangai ni nk kna ubah..kna buang dlu prangai bdk2 n x matang ni..kna prepare mentally n physically tok bina masjid n idup dgn soulmate ni..nmpk mudah but in reality, byk jg dugaan menanti..
but freaking siyes,ak nk kawin cpt..lately perasaan nk kawin tu m'buak2..b'cmbah2 n mekar harum mewangi..ya Allah,tlgla kurniaakn ak seorg pendamping iaitu suami yg halal bgku tok menemaniku d stp langkah kakiku menuju redha-Mu ya Allah..amin..
permudahkn la urusanku ini ya Allah..ak x perlukn kapel or llki yg tdk halal bgku tok b'kongsi kasih n syg tp ak amat2 memerlukn seorg suami yg mampu m'bimbing ak ke jln-Mu..yg sggup menerima ak seadanya..yg sggup b'susah senang dgnku n yg sggup m'jalani idup ni d stp hela nafasku..
jdikn la kami pasangan yg saling melengkapi antra 1 sma lain..yg sggup berubah bersama2 ke arah kebaikn..yg mampu m'jdi imam utkku n kurniaan kami anak2 yg soleh n solehah yg bakal m'doakn kesejahteraan kami d alam yg 1 lg..amin..
mne x nye..bl fkr2 blk,prangai ni nk kna ubah..kna buang dlu prangai bdk2 n x matang ni..kna prepare mentally n physically tok bina masjid n idup dgn soulmate ni..nmpk mudah but in reality, byk jg dugaan menanti..
but freaking siyes,ak nk kawin cpt..lately perasaan nk kawin tu m'buak2..b'cmbah2 n mekar harum mewangi..ya Allah,tlgla kurniaakn ak seorg pendamping iaitu suami yg halal bgku tok menemaniku d stp langkah kakiku menuju redha-Mu ya Allah..amin..
permudahkn la urusanku ini ya Allah..ak x perlukn kapel or llki yg tdk halal bgku tok b'kongsi kasih n syg tp ak amat2 memerlukn seorg suami yg mampu m'bimbing ak ke jln-Mu..yg sggup menerima ak seadanya..yg sggup b'susah senang dgnku n yg sggup m'jalani idup ni d stp hela nafasku..
jdikn la kami pasangan yg saling melengkapi antra 1 sma lain..yg sggup berubah bersama2 ke arah kebaikn..yg mampu m'jdi imam utkku n kurniaan kami anak2 yg soleh n solehah yg bakal m'doakn kesejahteraan kami d alam yg 1 lg..amin..
Monday, September 17, 2012
ujian + persahabatan
life is getting harder,harder n more harder each day..dugaan yg turun tnpa d sangka2..im almost give up of my stdy..nyaris2 nk quit sbb dh x mampu nk teruskn lg perjuangn tok genggam segulung ijazah..
everything changes..my stdy plan pn totally change..sume berubah dlm sekelip mta..nk x nk,kna wat perubahan drastik tbe2..n im blur..tetbe rse dunia ni gelap gelita..selang msa sehari,sume berubah so sudden..n im lost..im down to the earth..frustrated so much..cannot think anymore n trus wat a huge decision yg akn ubah msa dpn ak nti drpd a bright n light future to the darkness 1..
my inner strenght gone..ak x nmpk pape..fikiran ak kosong..dh x mampu nk fkr pape..yg ak tau,"i hv to quit my stdy..i hv to..i hv no choice anymore..wat else can i do except making dis decision..d only way out for me..yes, i hv to do dis..nothing else matter"..
without consulting others,ak wat keputusan cmni..due to financial prob,hiding these from my family n certain frens n dugaan yg muncul tbe2,ak lost sgt3x..air mta cme kua settitk dua je..xtaula nk ckp ak ckup tabah tok hdapi dugaan ni or ak dh penat hdapi mcm2 dugaan smpai airmta pn dh xnk kua..after 3 days,ak ttp cmni..sikit pn airmta x kua..ak pn cnfius..tabah ke or lemah ke ak ni!!!
but thanks to shakinah.ika n wan munirah n also akmal zamri sbb sntiasa ad d saat ak perlukn kekuatan tok teruskn perjuangn idup ni..yg x hnti2 m'dengar n bg nsht..yg sme2 kongsi my pain n my sadness..yg x look me down even once..im realy thankful to all of u..b'bekalkn semangat yg koag berikn,ak akn terus melangkah wlupn perit..
everything changes..my stdy plan pn totally change..sume berubah dlm sekelip mta..nk x nk,kna wat perubahan drastik tbe2..n im blur..tetbe rse dunia ni gelap gelita..selang msa sehari,sume berubah so sudden..n im lost..im down to the earth..frustrated so much..cannot think anymore n trus wat a huge decision yg akn ubah msa dpn ak nti drpd a bright n light future to the darkness 1..
my inner strenght gone..ak x nmpk pape..fikiran ak kosong..dh x mampu nk fkr pape..yg ak tau,"i hv to quit my stdy..i hv to..i hv no choice anymore..wat else can i do except making dis decision..d only way out for me..yes, i hv to do dis..nothing else matter"..
without consulting others,ak wat keputusan cmni..due to financial prob,hiding these from my family n certain frens n dugaan yg muncul tbe2,ak lost sgt3x..air mta cme kua settitk dua je..xtaula nk ckp ak ckup tabah tok hdapi dugaan ni or ak dh penat hdapi mcm2 dugaan smpai airmta pn dh xnk kua..after 3 days,ak ttp cmni..sikit pn airmta x kua..ak pn cnfius..tabah ke or lemah ke ak ni!!!
but thanks to shakinah.ika n wan munirah n also akmal zamri sbb sntiasa ad d saat ak perlukn kekuatan tok teruskn perjuangn idup ni..yg x hnti2 m'dengar n bg nsht..yg sme2 kongsi my pain n my sadness..yg x look me down even once..im realy thankful to all of u..b'bekalkn semangat yg koag berikn,ak akn terus melangkah wlupn perit..
Sunday, September 9, 2012
my wish.my hope n my dream to b
before going to bed,tetibe nk post something kt cni..actually its bout my wish since last year..ak nk sgt p lost world of tambun..giler nk sbb dgrny tmpt tu so awesome..ni gara2 lijah la ni..sje wat ak jeles msa part 4 sbb die teruja giler bercerita pasl tmpat tu after family holiday wif her cousin..up till now ak simpan impian tok g sna..
besides,ak nk jg p holiday kt tmpat2 percutian yg best..yg pntg mst ad laut sbb ak ske tgk laut n mndi laut..ak ske tgk pemandangan kt tepi laut..rse tenang giler..
other than taht,ak simpan impian tok tgk bunga api dgn someone special..rse mcm romantik giler je..ahahahaha..
ok..sekian impian tok arini..nk tido dh..
besides,ak nk jg p holiday kt tmpat2 percutian yg best..yg pntg mst ad laut sbb ak ske tgk laut n mndi laut..ak ske tgk pemandangan kt tepi laut..rse tenang giler..
other than taht,ak simpan impian tok tgk bunga api dgn someone special..rse mcm romantik giler je..ahahahaha..
ok..sekian impian tok arini..nk tido dh..
Saturday, September 8, 2012
fade
no need intro la kn..straight to the point je terus..
well,i kept on reminding u..pasword ak pn letak nme ko k..but ak xde la stil t'gila2kn ko,stil syg ko mcm dlu2..bese je..tp ak ske nme ko..sbb tu ak taruk nama ko s my pasword..lgpn nme ko kn lbh drp 8 abjad..so security of my account when using ur name s my pasword tu agak high..dats all..
even dh dkt 2 taun kte putus,tp ko ttp akn t'cari2 ak jg kn after b'bln2 kte x cntact..pndai lak ko cri ak erk pdhal dlu ko yg mnyepi camtu je..nsb la ak ni bkn jenis pompuan yg berkira n jns maki hamun org,so ak accept jela bl ko nk kwn dgn ak..accept dgn ati t'bka ok..x b'dendam pn wlupn sket..tp motif la ko stil nk t'cari2 ak lg pas kte last jmp dlu??bl dh jmp,ko mnyepi lg..then t'cari2 ak blk..dh byk kli k dlm msa 2 taun ni..
maafla..after ptus dlu.den mmg x cri ko dh..mls la dh nk jtuhkn air mke sbb ko..ak merayu skli je dlu time mula2 kte putus tp after dat,ak x penah merayu kt ko dh kn???cri ko pn x tp ko lak yg cri ak..hai la...await ko xleh tgk ak idup b'senang lenang tnpa ko haa???
tp xpe..ak tau motif ko cri ak blk keblgn ni..ak dh msk dgn prangai ko tu..sume dlm kocek..ceit..tp await ak x penah ckp pape dpn ko erk even ak x ske..hohohoho..org ckp,if kte b'jodoh dgn some1,we will act naturally when being wif him /her tp dgn ko,ak x mcm tu pn..suddenly sume perangai ak slme ni t'lindung dr p'lihatan ko..bkn wat2 tp naturally camtu..so tu tndany kte x b'jodoh la kn????hahahaha..btw after sume yg t'jdi ni,ak mmg x letak secebis hrpn pn tok jd wife ko..sket pn x..tp b'hrp tok jd wife org len..
well,i kept on reminding u..pasword ak pn letak nme ko k..but ak xde la stil t'gila2kn ko,stil syg ko mcm dlu2..bese je..tp ak ske nme ko..sbb tu ak taruk nama ko s my pasword..lgpn nme ko kn lbh drp 8 abjad..so security of my account when using ur name s my pasword tu agak high..dats all..
even dh dkt 2 taun kte putus,tp ko ttp akn t'cari2 ak jg kn after b'bln2 kte x cntact..pndai lak ko cri ak erk pdhal dlu ko yg mnyepi camtu je..nsb la ak ni bkn jenis pompuan yg berkira n jns maki hamun org,so ak accept jela bl ko nk kwn dgn ak..accept dgn ati t'bka ok..x b'dendam pn wlupn sket..tp motif la ko stil nk t'cari2 ak lg pas kte last jmp dlu??bl dh jmp,ko mnyepi lg..then t'cari2 ak blk..dh byk kli k dlm msa 2 taun ni..
maafla..after ptus dlu.den mmg x cri ko dh..mls la dh nk jtuhkn air mke sbb ko..ak merayu skli je dlu time mula2 kte putus tp after dat,ak x penah merayu kt ko dh kn???cri ko pn x tp ko lak yg cri ak..hai la...await ko xleh tgk ak idup b'senang lenang tnpa ko haa???
tp xpe..ak tau motif ko cri ak blk keblgn ni..ak dh msk dgn prangai ko tu..sume dlm kocek..ceit..tp await ak x penah ckp pape dpn ko erk even ak x ske..hohohoho..org ckp,if kte b'jodoh dgn some1,we will act naturally when being wif him /her tp dgn ko,ak x mcm tu pn..suddenly sume perangai ak slme ni t'lindung dr p'lihatan ko..bkn wat2 tp naturally camtu..so tu tndany kte x b'jodoh la kn????hahahaha..btw after sume yg t'jdi ni,ak mmg x letak secebis hrpn pn tok jd wife ko..sket pn x..tp b'hrp tok jd wife org len..
Wednesday, September 5, 2012
answers
bl single,rse sunyi lak tp bl kapel n dpt bf ntah pape,bek xyah kapel..even skrg ni im litle bit lonely tp ak x ready lg nk in a relationship dgn spe2..ak pcye cinta tp based on my experiences, cinta b4 kawin sgt2 x menjamin pape..so skrg misi tok m'cri jodoh yg sbnr n b'cnta bgai nk rak pas kawin..
siyes skrg rse sgt2 xnk b'cnta lg..once org nk rapat,cnfirm ak jauhkn dri..malas n muak dh..hope kekal la cmni smpi ak ketemu jodoh ak..amin!!!!!
but deep down inside,ati ak ni dh ad penghuni tp based on our real situation,xde kemungkinan blh bersama smula..dh 2 taun ak ske die even ni mcm sebelah pihak tepok x b'bnyi la..even camtu,even hbgn ktorg byk surut dr pasangnye,insyaAllah yg berhak tntukn sglany adlh Allah..so no need to worry..keep praying 4 his safety n hapines whenever he is..always..doa dlm diam..
actually,ak ad soklan nk tny dri ak sndr psl die..my question to myself goes like dis:
'aini,knp ko ske die bgai nk rak erk??"
my answer:
"ak pn xtau npe ak ske die smpi skrg even ktorg dh putus dlu..nk ckp ak hepi giler bl dgn die, xde pn..bl kua dgn die,mcm kua dgn org yg educated gler..nk kna behave n manner..die x suh pn react camtu tp naturally prangai ak jd camtu bl dgn die..nk wat prangai giler2 ak slme ni pn x leh..bl dgn die,dok pn sopan..x gelak t'bahak2 mcm yg ak slalu wat..x wat lawak bodoh..x b'tikam lidah..x b'debat ttg topik2 x b'faedah mcm yg ak slalu wat dgn kwn2 llki ak yg len..sgt manner la s a conclusion..after ptus pn even jmp,stil camtu..pas die anta ak blk,cnfirm ak dh tngkap leleh pastu..nangis org2 sbb sedih tbe2..mmg stpkli pas jmp die ak jd snsitif camtu..lps putusla..ntahla..awaitla ak blh ske die thp gaban cmni after sume yg die wat kt ak slme ni???knp3x???ak bek doe..x materialistik pn..x penah mnta pape kt die..well.its my fate..redha!!!!
siyes skrg rse sgt2 xnk b'cnta lg..once org nk rapat,cnfirm ak jauhkn dri..malas n muak dh..hope kekal la cmni smpi ak ketemu jodoh ak..amin!!!!!
but deep down inside,ati ak ni dh ad penghuni tp based on our real situation,xde kemungkinan blh bersama smula..dh 2 taun ak ske die even ni mcm sebelah pihak tepok x b'bnyi la..even camtu,even hbgn ktorg byk surut dr pasangnye,insyaAllah yg berhak tntukn sglany adlh Allah..so no need to worry..keep praying 4 his safety n hapines whenever he is..always..doa dlm diam..
actually,ak ad soklan nk tny dri ak sndr psl die..my question to myself goes like dis:
'aini,knp ko ske die bgai nk rak erk??"
my answer:
"ak pn xtau npe ak ske die smpi skrg even ktorg dh putus dlu..nk ckp ak hepi giler bl dgn die, xde pn..bl kua dgn die,mcm kua dgn org yg educated gler..nk kna behave n manner..die x suh pn react camtu tp naturally prangai ak jd camtu bl dgn die..nk wat prangai giler2 ak slme ni pn x leh..bl dgn die,dok pn sopan..x gelak t'bahak2 mcm yg ak slalu wat..x wat lawak bodoh..x b'tikam lidah..x b'debat ttg topik2 x b'faedah mcm yg ak slalu wat dgn kwn2 llki ak yg len..sgt manner la s a conclusion..after ptus pn even jmp,stil camtu..pas die anta ak blk,cnfirm ak dh tngkap leleh pastu..nangis org2 sbb sedih tbe2..mmg stpkli pas jmp die ak jd snsitif camtu..lps putusla..ntahla..awaitla ak blh ske die thp gaban cmni after sume yg die wat kt ak slme ni???knp3x???ak bek doe..x materialistik pn..x penah mnta pape kt die..well.its my fate..redha!!!!
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