tlg jgn jtuh cnta kt sy..kli ni sy tol2 xnk ad pape hbgn special dgn spe2..i juz wanna b ur fren..dats all..don expect me to give more to u..siyesly i cant..sy dh ckp jgn ad perasaan len antra kte slen prsn syg sorg shbt sbb sy xleh nk bg lbh dr tu..sy bkn jns yg senang nk bg ati kt org even keliling sy rmai yg nk share ati die dgn sy..kte start dgn kwn n hope smpi bl2 pn stil kwn..sy tau sy akn fall kt some1 once i met him at d 1st place..but skrg ati sy tol2 x t'bka kt awk,awk n awk..so xperlu la nk msg sy ari2 n m'hrpkn sy msg awk k..xperlu jg nk mrh2 klu sy x reply msg awk..if x pntg,xperlu la nk over protected or jelousy thp gaban kt sy..form d bottom of my heart,sy dh x pcye cnta sblm kawin..sy x rse nk b'cnta pn skrg ni..ati ni insyaAllah dlm msa t'dkt ni xkn t'bka dkt spe2..1st time ak ad feeling negatif towards love cmni..pls don jiwang2 karat dgn ak k..mud ak akn spoil trus nti..i juz cant to b in luf again until i met some1 yg insyaAllah akn jd suami ak nti..

lately dh ad penyakit bru..rimas btl dgn pnyakit ni..nk rawat pn susah sbb dh mcm sebati lak dlm dri ni..dlu dh penah kna skli..amek msa 4 taun jg nk rawat..kli ni dtg blk..dh mcm cyst lak sbb blh ilang n then kna blk..x ske la..klu jmp doc pn,doc tntu xleh wat pape..kna jmp psychiatrist ni..ehek..yucks..dh mcm mental lak..
actually ak sgt2 x ske dgr n bce ayt2 jiwang..klu ad fren list ak post kt fb,adui..rse nk remove je dorg tu dr fren list ak sbb jiwang giler..lg 1,ak dh x cye la cinta2 b4 kawin ni..i learnt a lot from my past experiences but to tell them yg tgh hangat b'cinta tu spy beragak2 dlm m'beri ati,cnfirmla dorg xkn dgr unless dorg sndr dh rse skitny putus cnta..but most of them x penah bljr dr luka dlu..
once jtuh cnta,ko syg die giler2 even llki tu ur 3rd or 4th lover of yours..meaning dat ko dh adn experience putus cnta b4 dis but never learn from dat lesson..pls wake up..there is no true luv unless u get marry wif dat guy ..

redha

ak bhgia cmni..wlupn xde bf tp ati ak tenang..wlupn sumeny dh jd kenangan tp ak b'syukur sglanya dh berakhir..rindu????yup rindu giler kt die tp skrg x lg...perasaan tu ak dh kuburkn ktne ntah..dh ilang..mrh pn xde..bia la die dgn kebhgiaan die sndr..ak x sme dgn org len..putus cnta je nk update status buruk2kn ex gf/bf die kt fb..caci maki die kt fon..mrh giler2 n nangis x ingt dunia..ocnfirmla tu bkn ak kn even awl2 dlu  mmg nangis jg la tp pastu mmg dh tekad x nk nangis dh psl die..life must goes on..if die bhgia,kte jg blh bhgia..kte sndr la yg kna cri jln tok bhgiakn dri kte..mrh sbb ati d permenkn??? xperlula..mkin kte b'dendam,mkin kte skt ati..ati pn x tenang..lgpn knala pcye jodoh kte Allah yg ttpkn..dh Dia ckp jodoh kte n si die smpai situ je,redha la..ko nk meroyan giler2 pn x gne sbb klu dh d tkdirkn die bkn jdoh kte,xdeny die dtg kt kte blk..accept jela ketentuan tu..redha n doakn kbhgiaan die jg..

only once in ur life

“Only once in your life, I truly believe, you find someone who can completely turn your world around. You tell them things that you’ve never shared with another soul and they absorb everything you say and actually want to hear more. You share hopes for the future, dreams that will never come true, goals that were never achieved and the many disappointments life has thrown at you. 

When something wonderful happens, you can’t wait to tell them about it, knowing they will share in your excitement. They are not embarrassed to cry with you when you are hurting or laugh with you when you make a fool of yourself. Never do they hurt your feelings or make you feel like you are not good enough, but rather they build you up and show you the things about yourself that make you special and even beautiful. 

There is never any pressure, jealousy or competition but only a quiet calmness when they are around. You can be yourself and not worry about what they will think of you because they love you for who you are. The things that seem insignificant to most people such as a note, song or walk become invaluable treasures kept safe in your heart to cherish forever. 

Memories of your childhood come back and are so clear and vivid it’s like being young again. Colours seem brighter and more brilliant. Laughter seems part of daily life where before it was infrequent or didn’t exist at all. A phone call or two during the day helps to get you through a long day’s work and always brings a smile to your face.

 In their presence, there’s no need for continuous conversation, but you find you’re quite content in just having them nearby. Things that never interested you before become fascinating because you know they are important to this person who is so special to you. You think of this person on every occasion and in everything you do. Simple things bring them to mind like a pale blue sky, gentle wind or even a storm cloud on the horizon. 

You open your heart knowing that there’s a chance it may be broken one day and in opening your heart, you experience a love and joy that you never dreamed possible. You find that being vulnerable is the only way to allow your heart to feel true pleasure that’s so real it scares you. You find strength in knowing you have a true friend and possibly a soul mate who will remain loyal to the end. 

Life seems completely different, exciting and worthwhile. Your only hope and security is in knowing that they are a part of your life.”

21/5/12 isnin mlm

hati...
aduh...mslh lg....b4 jmp die smlm,giler kuat b'debar jntung ni....rse mcm nk melompat kua je...nk explode pn ade....tp knp dgn die je jd cmni??ngn ex2 ak b4 dis x penah pn ad feeling sedahsyat ni..bkn stakat xde feeling camtu,b'debar sikit pn x...tp dgn die mmg over giler.......shaking giler sementara tgu die dtg amek ak smlm....seram sejuk....tgn pn jd pucat je....aduh...ati ni wat hal sokmo bl dgn die....bl die col ckp die dh smpi dpn umah,ok.........siyesly debaran tu x kurang2.........after 6 months x jmp,perasaan tu ttp hebat.......lg hebat dr sblm ni......after knl die staun lbh ni,perasaan tu ttp sme n x b'kurang sikit pn.......ya Allah, pe yg KAU nk tunjukkn pd ak ni??dia ke jodoh yg ak cri2 slme ni??die ke jodohku yg sbnr2nye??


smlm mkn kt d'One steak house....die blnja mkn sbb ktorg wat deal.team yg klh game piala FA kna blnja mkn either lambchop or ciken chop n my team menang...ak sokong kelantan n die sokong sime darby...dlm keta otw g sna, die cite yg die bru pindah umah bru kt area jj bukit raja....ok,yg tu ak dh tau tp yg wat ak gelak x ingt dunianye sbb die ckp die kna pindah lg sbb umah bru die tu akan tamat contract by d end of dis month.....bru 21 ari die dok sna....malang tol nsb die...msuk ni dh 3x pindah umah...klu kna pindah lg,kli ke 4 la...hehe....1st time kua dgn die ak x control gelak......gelak bsr......smpai time tgh2 mkn pn ak stil t'gelak2kn die.......


then tetbe die ckp,"my housemate ajak p karok tp i xde teman...u free x??jd partner i sbb dorg bwa teman".....seabis je ayat die, ak trus gelak bsr sbb it sounds funny ok...ade ke nk bwa ak p karok dgn ak pki bju kurung cmtu...x sesuai lngsung......die ckp die x kisah ak pki pe pn asalkn ak teman gak die....dat was d most hillarious moment btween us......yesterday nite......sbb ak jd d real me bl dgn die....ak ske gelak n yup......mlm smlm mmg kje ak gelak je.....dgr dorg nyanyi pn ak gelak2....skli my ex tego,"u gelak2 kt org...pasni u kna nyanyi gak"....ok...trus diam......


b4 kwn2 die dtg tu,ak beria2 wat deal dgn die yg ak xnk nyanyi...then ak bg die dua pilihan...1st ak jd backup singer n 2nd xyah nyanyi lnsung....beria2 ak request die camtu smpai bulat2 mta ak pndang die.....ak siap ckp klu ak nyanyi, cnfirm mikrofon rosak...xpn bumbung bilik karok tu runtuh...die gelak je..n die jwb,"no....u hv to sing...compulsory...my housemate sume request u tok nyanyi skli..."ok....im dead.........ak nyanyi skli je sbb neves giler.....suara pn t'ketar2 je.........request la cmne pn,peduli pe ak.....AKU XNK NYANYI!!!!!!!!!!!!!


time die nyanyi tu, ak mmg dr dlu lg ckp sore die mmg tahap klasik giler....thp ibnor reza....tp ak ske dgr die nyanyi lgu dan-shiela on 7, dat's y u go away by micheal learns to rock, twin die,ibnor reza tp xtau lagu pe n matta-jatuh cnta lg....mmg kna......bl die nyanyi lgu dats y u go away, time rangkap:

But I'm not the man your heart is missing

That's why you go away I know

4 d 1st rangkap tu,die tunjuk dri die n 4 d 2nd one,die tunjuk ak.......stpkli part ni,mst die wat camtu...ak senyum jela....then ad 1 lg lagu,tajuk die patriotik giler, nusa n bangsa tp bl smpai rangkap yg, "bl dh dpt segenggam ijazah,kembali la ke pangkuanku"...die pndang n tujuk ak then tunjuk dri die sndr.....ok....something fishy there....huh......tlgla jgn bg hint yg blh wat ak menaruh hrpn lg.......takut x spt yg d impikn je nti........

blk umah dh kul 2 sbb moto kwn die rosak....huh....lame giler....pastu g mnum kt barra......blk umah je ak x dpt tdo sbb ak x normal...jntung b'degup giler smpi lps subuh......x tenang tol ati ni pas jumpa die...tnsion tol....dgn die je cmni..........tlgla........aish........

kehilangan amat menyakitkn

"jgn m'cari jika hilangnya aku, jgn b'sedih dgn ketiadaan aku, jgn berduka krn perginya aku, jgn mengharap dengan bantuan aku utk m'gembirakanmu krn sesungguhnya aku insan yg tak punya kuasa, byk khilaf dan dosa….
jika kalian menganggapku sempurna, pasti kalian akan menyesal suatu hari nanti pabila kalian lihat keburukanku....."




im referring these words to her where in past,i used to b her besfren...but now,kami tol2 dh mcm org asing....hbgn tu totally different...dr rakan bek mgkin skrg dh b'tukar m'jdi enemy....mayb die anggap ak bkn kwn die lg tp smpi bl2 pn ak ttp anggap die my besfren ever...yup....ak penah wat silap...silap sbb memberi teguran pdny pdhal ak sndr msih bengkok...teguran yg pd asalny mmg b'niat bek d slh ertikn oleh die sbb pdny org yg penah wat bnda yg sma,yg slh, yg dosany lg byk, x layak nk tegur die smpi bl2...x layak nk nshtkn die wlupn skli....sygku _ _ _ _ _, demi Allah ak xde niat t'sirat bl ak mnta die smpaikn pesanan tu pd ko...ak tau ak x layak nk nsht ko, n i chose d alternative 1 tok smpikn pd ko....n im realy3x sori if i hurt u so bad....u know how much i care 4 u...kte knl dh 4 taun lbh....ssh senang sme2....penah sebilik,sebantal,secawan,sepinggan n everything..ak dahulukn duit ak tok ko stpkli ko xde duit...pkse2 jg ko amek duit tu wlupn ko xnk n ak xnk ko byr cpt2 sbb ak takut ko xde duit nk bli mknan or else..bl kte sme2 sebilik kt hostel dlu, ak sllu pastikn pe yg ak mkn,ko pn mkn jg....ak syg ko smpi ak pkse2 ko mkn wlupn puas ko tolak sbb ak tau ko pn x mkn lg....bl ko sedih,ak pn sedih jg tp ak x tunjuk sbb ak xnk ko b'tambah sedih....ak cte every single thing kt ko....sbb ak pcye ko n syg ko sgt2....yup....ak bengkok....ak x mcm ko...tp d sbbkn ak syg ko giler2 la ak tegur....dr dlu lg, stpkli ko dtg cni, ak akn pkse ko mkn msakan ak...ko antra org pertama yg ak dahulukn x kira la dlm bab mkn ke or whatever it is...ak admit,ak x pndai dlm b'kata2 n ak siyes minta maaf sgt2 sbb im no longer ur besfren....u know how much  i miss our moment together...b'cerita, gelak2 sme2, kua mlm2 tgu bus kt perindu semta2 nk g mkn keow teow kungfu kt sec 2...g karaoke stpkli pas abis paper or time tgh stress...b'gayut lama2 tok gosip psl org tu n org ni....i mis dat moment so damn much... n u never know dat yg ak sllu jdikn ko sumber inspirasi time stdy...nk tau knp??sbb we r not brilliant like others...blh ckp tiap2 sem ad je paper yg kte kna repeat tp ko x penah pn give up n fkr nk benti bljr...so do i....ak amek semangat ko wlupn kdng2 kte down gler fkrkn cmne nk abiskn stdy kt cni dgn each sem ad paper kantoi....tp kte x give up kn??stil b'juang smpi akhirny...my dearest fren, im realy hepi bl ko dh dpt some1 much3 more better than ur past sbb  ak nmpk dpn mta betapa bhgiany ko...im not jelous at all tp siyes ak tumpang gembira tok ko....hope kekal smpi syurga k...
tp sekarang....kte dh mcm x penah knl....ak cbe tok dekati ko smula...mnta maaf kt ko seikhlas ati wlupn x b'dpn...sktny sgt trase bl ko ad dpn mta tp kte b'2 mcm x penah knl lngsung slme ni....stpkli ko dtg cni, ak x nk t'serempak dgn ko sbb takut ko x slesa dgn ak....pdhal ak giler2 nk jmp ko....ati ni skt sgt tok pretend smpi mcm tu sbb once, we used to b a very gud fren n close one....n im realy sori abb ak x layak tok nk bg advise kt ko....but pls read this:

Tidak tersabit larangan dari Nabi untuk seseorang yang bahkan baru masuk Islam untuk pergi berdakwah kepada kaumnya. Maksudnya, dakwah itu tuntutan. Selagi kau Islam, dakwah tu wajib walaupun kau sendiri tak berapa betul. Sekurang-kurang dia insaf dan bertaubat sekarang.


wlupn ak jahat n x sebaik ko, tp pcye la niat ak ikhlas...ak nk ko jd pompuan yg bek2 sbb ak dh t'lps peluang tu...


‎"..aku mahu jadi lebih baik walaupun tidak bisa padamkan kesalahan-kesalahan masa lalu.."
 ak bukanlah bagus sangat..Tapi InsyaAllah . ak menuju & ' Berusaha Untuk Menjadi Baik ' . 




Sometimes, I wish I have the ability to read thru' the minds of others...to understand them better and avoid any misunderstanding, cos all I want is PEACE......

kalaula ak blk bce fkrn org,bnda ni tntu xkn jdi kt kte kn....n kte ttp akn b'kwn bek smpi bl2...n now, i choose to silent off my mouth sbb xnk ad org yg mkn ati ngn ak lg...ckupla ko sorg je...tu pn dh ckup menyakitkn ak giler2....

syukran ya Allah...

alhamdulillah....rse nk sujud syukur je last nite sbb dpt berita yg paling d tgu2 slama ni...

obviously hepi giler2...

n org pertama yg share kehepian ak ni adela die,my beloved 1,fiz sbb time tu tgh kua dgn die....

at first plan nk kua mkn tp duit dlm tgn cnfirm x ckup nk nk byr mkanan...

then g 7e tok withdraw money....

bl cek2 balance dlm account,"ish...npe byk sgt jumlah ni??kn x dpt loan dis sem...ke slh tgk''?

kua dr 7e dgn mke b'kerut2 giler n msuk keta, then pndg die n ckp,"nur pelikla...duit dlm account ad 3 ribu lbh pdhal nur kn x dpt loan"

then die ckp,"loan dh msukla tu"

tp ak bls blk,"ish...xknla...org ptptn 2 sndr ckp sem ni nur gagal dpt loan"

msa diner pn asyik ulang2 bnda yg sma sbb x pcye lngsung ad duit segedebuk trus mcm tu....

pastu ajak die g bank len tok cek lg skli....

ya Allah,siyes rse nk lompat2 kt situ jg bl cek2 balance mmg ad jumlah yg sma byk dgn msa 1st time cek td...

siyes,trus raup mke n ucap alhamdulillah...

wlupn time nk cek tu jantung dup dap dup dap dup dap....

pergh...trus kua dr petronas dgn mke t'senyum2 n share this happines wif my beloved mum,bro n family...
(juz calling them via fon sementra fiz p solat maghrib)

mak pn b'syukur giler dpt tau news ni....

juz totally hepi smlm....

fiz pn tegor npe nmpk hepi semcm je then ak jwb"mestila hepi sbb loan dh msuk n at the same time dpt kua dgn fiz"...

kuang3x...ayat yg sgt xtau malu....dush.......

die sengeh je dgr jwpn ak....

smlm blk umah jap amek sweater sbb nk g tgk wayang then trus suh atin n finas peluk ak sbb perasaan hepi tu siyes x dpt d ungkap dgn kta2....

seronok b'ganda2...

alhamdulillah ya Allah...

doaku KAU makbulkn....

KAU ilangkn resah gelisah,gundah gulana dgn m'berikn jwpn yg sgt2 ak tgu sebln ni....

Alhamdulillah...alhamdulillah...alhamdulillah...

Kau maha Mendengar  lg Maha Mengasihani <3<3<3